You Are What You Eat
By Joseph Grant
As the self-proclaimed guru of health and fitness, Dr. Sam Watkins saw many a morbidly obese patient walk unhappily through the doorway of his practice. While this could be seen as a result of his being a renowned proponent of a regimen of diet and exercise to shrink the ever-expanding belt of mid-America, it was more than likely due to the fact that these people were prisoners in their own bodies and the fact that his infomercials that showcased his exotic diet resorts ran 24/7 on cable more than anything else. In the hunger for ratings, the very late night talk shows that parodied him as “The Diet Master” ironically began to salivate in a network feeding frenzy over who would have the increasingly popular doctor on first. It was on one of these shows that the doctor announced to an excited student audience that he would select 20 lucky patients from a national lottery to accompany him on an all-expense paid trip to Bora Bora to open the most luxurious diet resort to date. Praised as the savior of America’s health, he was a favorite of political and church leaders, Congress awarded him a special medal of merit and Time Magazine honored him as their Man of the Year while CNN covered the maiden flight, but the flight received unprecedented coverage by the world media when it was feared lost at sea. It was later learned that a disheveled, portly man who had been picked up by a passing Japanese fishing troller months later was in fact, the very same fitness guru who had gone stark raving mad when the food supply ran out on a small deserted island and as a result, hunted his poor obese patients to extinction.
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Joseph Grant has had 178 stories published in nearly as many literary reviews.
By Joseph Grant
As the self-proclaimed guru of health and fitness, Dr. Sam Watkins saw many a morbidly obese patient walk unhappily through the doorway of his practice. While this could be seen as a result of his being a renowned proponent of a regimen of diet and exercise to shrink the ever-expanding belt of mid-America, it was more than likely due to the fact that these people were prisoners in their own bodies and the fact that his infomercials that showcased his exotic diet resorts ran 24/7 on cable more than anything else. In the hunger for ratings, the very late night talk shows that parodied him as “The Diet Master” ironically began to salivate in a network feeding frenzy over who would have the increasingly popular doctor on first. It was on one of these shows that the doctor announced to an excited student audience that he would select 20 lucky patients from a national lottery to accompany him on an all-expense paid trip to Bora Bora to open the most luxurious diet resort to date. Praised as the savior of America’s health, he was a favorite of political and church leaders, Congress awarded him a special medal of merit and Time Magazine honored him as their Man of the Year while CNN covered the maiden flight, but the flight received unprecedented coverage by the world media when it was feared lost at sea. It was later learned that a disheveled, portly man who had been picked up by a passing Japanese fishing troller months later was in fact, the very same fitness guru who had gone stark raving mad when the food supply ran out on a small deserted island and as a result, hunted his poor obese patients to extinction.
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Joseph Grant has had 178 stories published in nearly as many literary reviews.
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