Asylum Fairy Tales
Alana I. Capria
1
Kick a can. The scarecrow comes home to his cell tonight. He tells his little girls, Don't you play with that ball after midnight, but still catches them rolling the rubber balloons up and down the spider stairwell. Why, Daddy Straw? Why, the girls ask, rubbing cobwebs in their faces. The Baba Lady will come get you, the Straw Daddy says. The girls squeeze in and out of the bars. They touch the ball at the stroke of midnight and watch a crack form in the very middle. You should have listened to the Straw Daddy, a voice says within. The Baby Lady reaches for the girls and pulls them in. There is much candy here. All for me to eat, she says and the ball closes up. The Straw Daddy does not notice the four chicken legs sticking out of the bottom of the ball. The Baby Lady runs away, children and all.
2
In the midst of his lobotomy, a man lays an egg on the table. The doctors watch the egg roll up and down the table. Its ends tap against the raised table sides until the shell cracks. The doctors loosen the man's scalp from his head to reveal the cerebrum. They peer into the skull and gasp. The head is completely void. They place their hands inside the empty head and feel around the scraped bone basin. The egg rolls around again. The shell halves separate complete. A throbbing brain spills onto the table, veins and wrinkles raised and pronounced. The doctors tap the top of the brain with the blunt ends of their scalpels. The man's eyes droop. They rub the brain with the palms of their hands. The man's eyes spring open. I birth this brain as nature intended, the man says. Goodbye, egg, brain.
3
A woman pricks her index finger with a used syringe and falls into a deep sleep. Doctors come with a stretcher and place the woman upon it. She snores while rocking back and forth on the cot. The doctors sing as they bring her down thirteen flights of stairs. Sleeping Beauty came to a rest on the opposite shore. She wanted the prince but got a squid. The witch came to let her in, the doctors say. They come to a stop beside a large tank of water. The woman keeps her eyes closed as the doctors secure a straitjacket around her torso. They carry her up a twenty-five foot hour and drop her into the tank. She sinks down, her hair streaming around her. Her face presses up against the glass. The doctors press their lips to hers. Her eyes flutter. She opens her mouth and tries to hum.
4
A man goes to a witch at the nursing station. I would like a new face, the man says. The witch takes his temperature with a rectal thermometer to the tongue and consults her clipboard. You've been given five faces already, she says finally. The man hands her a canvas sack. The witch pulls the sides apart and looks inside. Can't I have one more, the man asks. The witch puts the bag back together and places it onto her hanging tongue. She lets the bag sit for a moment before swallowing it whole. One more, she says and pulls a scythe from her apron pocket. But you must peel it off yourself, she says. The man goes to the visiting room. The man kisses his father's hands gratefully. His father looks away and the man peels the edges of the elder's face away. I will be you, Father, the man says
5
A woman finds a glass slipper and a wooden basket in her stomach one day after examinations. She stuffs both her hands down her throat and grumbles against the pressure. While inside, she adjusts the respiratory tubes that have gotten knotted. She massages the gastrointestinal tract. She plucks the ripe eggs preparing to fall into her womb. They are heavy. The shells are compacted. The woman cracks one egg and then another into a cast iron pan. She fries the eggs on the iron bars and waits for the perfect omelet to form. For the wizard, when he comes, she says and leaves the plate at the foot of her bed. She watches the cell walls expectantly. Witches file into the room, hissing and clicking their tongues. They bring their cats along. I'm allergic, the woman says and throws poisoned breasts at them.
6
A man makes enemies with his body. One day, it is friendly, with normal processes. The next day, it is his mortal enemy, with bowels seizing up and the stomach developing crude ulcers. The man pries his digestive system free from his mouth. Dripping stomach acid makes it hard for him to talk. His kidneys convince him that he has diabetes. The man drinks bile secretions to cure headaches. He finds a straw witch in the cafeteria. Could you make me new, he asks. The witch looks him over. She lights a match and flicks the flame onto her forehead. Of course, she cries. Of course. She vacuums the colitis from his skull and inserts an anus up his nose. He sniffs and expels. She places the bladder sack in his ear. Better, she says. Better. He covers his face with a diaper and breathes.
- - -
Alana I. Capria is a candidate in the MFA in Creative Writing program at Fairleigh Dickinson University. She lives in Northern New Jersey with her fiancé and rabbits.
Alana I. Capria
1
Kick a can. The scarecrow comes home to his cell tonight. He tells his little girls, Don't you play with that ball after midnight, but still catches them rolling the rubber balloons up and down the spider stairwell. Why, Daddy Straw? Why, the girls ask, rubbing cobwebs in their faces. The Baba Lady will come get you, the Straw Daddy says. The girls squeeze in and out of the bars. They touch the ball at the stroke of midnight and watch a crack form in the very middle. You should have listened to the Straw Daddy, a voice says within. The Baby Lady reaches for the girls and pulls them in. There is much candy here. All for me to eat, she says and the ball closes up. The Straw Daddy does not notice the four chicken legs sticking out of the bottom of the ball. The Baby Lady runs away, children and all.
2
In the midst of his lobotomy, a man lays an egg on the table. The doctors watch the egg roll up and down the table. Its ends tap against the raised table sides until the shell cracks. The doctors loosen the man's scalp from his head to reveal the cerebrum. They peer into the skull and gasp. The head is completely void. They place their hands inside the empty head and feel around the scraped bone basin. The egg rolls around again. The shell halves separate complete. A throbbing brain spills onto the table, veins and wrinkles raised and pronounced. The doctors tap the top of the brain with the blunt ends of their scalpels. The man's eyes droop. They rub the brain with the palms of their hands. The man's eyes spring open. I birth this brain as nature intended, the man says. Goodbye, egg, brain.
3
A woman pricks her index finger with a used syringe and falls into a deep sleep. Doctors come with a stretcher and place the woman upon it. She snores while rocking back and forth on the cot. The doctors sing as they bring her down thirteen flights of stairs. Sleeping Beauty came to a rest on the opposite shore. She wanted the prince but got a squid. The witch came to let her in, the doctors say. They come to a stop beside a large tank of water. The woman keeps her eyes closed as the doctors secure a straitjacket around her torso. They carry her up a twenty-five foot hour and drop her into the tank. She sinks down, her hair streaming around her. Her face presses up against the glass. The doctors press their lips to hers. Her eyes flutter. She opens her mouth and tries to hum.
4
A man goes to a witch at the nursing station. I would like a new face, the man says. The witch takes his temperature with a rectal thermometer to the tongue and consults her clipboard. You've been given five faces already, she says finally. The man hands her a canvas sack. The witch pulls the sides apart and looks inside. Can't I have one more, the man asks. The witch puts the bag back together and places it onto her hanging tongue. She lets the bag sit for a moment before swallowing it whole. One more, she says and pulls a scythe from her apron pocket. But you must peel it off yourself, she says. The man goes to the visiting room. The man kisses his father's hands gratefully. His father looks away and the man peels the edges of the elder's face away. I will be you, Father, the man says
5
A woman finds a glass slipper and a wooden basket in her stomach one day after examinations. She stuffs both her hands down her throat and grumbles against the pressure. While inside, she adjusts the respiratory tubes that have gotten knotted. She massages the gastrointestinal tract. She plucks the ripe eggs preparing to fall into her womb. They are heavy. The shells are compacted. The woman cracks one egg and then another into a cast iron pan. She fries the eggs on the iron bars and waits for the perfect omelet to form. For the wizard, when he comes, she says and leaves the plate at the foot of her bed. She watches the cell walls expectantly. Witches file into the room, hissing and clicking their tongues. They bring their cats along. I'm allergic, the woman says and throws poisoned breasts at them.
6
A man makes enemies with his body. One day, it is friendly, with normal processes. The next day, it is his mortal enemy, with bowels seizing up and the stomach developing crude ulcers. The man pries his digestive system free from his mouth. Dripping stomach acid makes it hard for him to talk. His kidneys convince him that he has diabetes. The man drinks bile secretions to cure headaches. He finds a straw witch in the cafeteria. Could you make me new, he asks. The witch looks him over. She lights a match and flicks the flame onto her forehead. Of course, she cries. Of course. She vacuums the colitis from his skull and inserts an anus up his nose. He sniffs and expels. She places the bladder sack in his ear. Better, she says. Better. He covers his face with a diaper and breathes.
- - -
Alana I. Capria is a candidate in the MFA in Creative Writing program at Fairleigh Dickinson University. She lives in Northern New Jersey with her fiancé and rabbits.
0 Responses
Post a Comment
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
