Bad Pizza
by Don Bagley
The Dollar Store had had a freezer section for over a year. David had purchased small bags of frozen vegetables and fries and cheap frozen dinners there. Today he reckoned he would get two small frozen pizzas for himself and his wife. All the small pizza boxes in the freezer were the Jeno brand except one. It was a slightly larger box of the Antonio brand.
When he paid for his purchases, David noticed that the cashier held up the Antonio pizza and remarked that she’d never seen the brand. He gave her his eight dollars and tax and thought no more of it until he got home.
As he placed the two small pizza boxes in the freezer next to the ice cube trays, he had a disturbing thought. What if the Dollar Store never did sell Antonio brand frozen pizza? What if someone placed that pizza in the freezer as a prank? Perhaps the Antonio pizza had thawed out to the point of spoilage, and then been set in front of unsuspecting shoppers so that someone would buy it and become sick after consuming it. Was it worth a dollar to find out the hard way?
David took the Antonio pizza and tossed it in the large garbage can in the garage. He wouldn’t chance his health or the health of his wife for a buck. In the morning the garbage truck would come and the trash would be forgotten.
His wife called him at four o’clock to let him know she’d be late. She had to work an extra half-shift so he should have dinner without her. He told her he’d microwave a burrito and not to worry.
After his burrito and the six o’clock news, he fell asleep on the sofa. He had a disturbing dream that his wife looked in the trash and retrieved the Antonio pizza. In his dream the pizza box was dripping with green mold, and it was writhing as if animated from inside.
Still, his wife was oblivious, and she put the box in the microwave and pushed a couple of buttons, bleep, bleep. When she removed it from the box, the pizza rippled in her hands. She held it up before her face and it wriggled into her mouth. She turned to face him, “Sorry I didn’t share,” she said, blood dripping over her chin. She had a kitchen knife in her right hand. “Wanna die now?” she asked.
David awoke, his hair soaked with sweat, on the couch. It was dark outside and he walked to the bedroom to find his wife asleep on the king bed. They often slept separately, as he had a tendency to snore.
There wasn’t really any reason to think that anything was amiss, but he felt uneasy. Though it was the last thing he wanted to do, he decided to go look in the trash. He opened the door to the garage and let himself in. There was enough ambient moonlight coming through the windows that he didn’t have to turn on the fluorescents.
He looked in the garbage can and saw the Antonio pizza box. Relieved, he grabbed the box. But it collapsed, empty, between his fingers. And worse, he heard the rattle of someone trying the garage door.
- - -
Don Bagley writes from his home in north California. His work has appeared in Weiryear, Anotherealm, AlienSkin and Hackwriters UK. He's not mad like they say.
by Don Bagley
The Dollar Store had had a freezer section for over a year. David had purchased small bags of frozen vegetables and fries and cheap frozen dinners there. Today he reckoned he would get two small frozen pizzas for himself and his wife. All the small pizza boxes in the freezer were the Jeno brand except one. It was a slightly larger box of the Antonio brand.
When he paid for his purchases, David noticed that the cashier held up the Antonio pizza and remarked that she’d never seen the brand. He gave her his eight dollars and tax and thought no more of it until he got home.
As he placed the two small pizza boxes in the freezer next to the ice cube trays, he had a disturbing thought. What if the Dollar Store never did sell Antonio brand frozen pizza? What if someone placed that pizza in the freezer as a prank? Perhaps the Antonio pizza had thawed out to the point of spoilage, and then been set in front of unsuspecting shoppers so that someone would buy it and become sick after consuming it. Was it worth a dollar to find out the hard way?
David took the Antonio pizza and tossed it in the large garbage can in the garage. He wouldn’t chance his health or the health of his wife for a buck. In the morning the garbage truck would come and the trash would be forgotten.
His wife called him at four o’clock to let him know she’d be late. She had to work an extra half-shift so he should have dinner without her. He told her he’d microwave a burrito and not to worry.
After his burrito and the six o’clock news, he fell asleep on the sofa. He had a disturbing dream that his wife looked in the trash and retrieved the Antonio pizza. In his dream the pizza box was dripping with green mold, and it was writhing as if animated from inside.
Still, his wife was oblivious, and she put the box in the microwave and pushed a couple of buttons, bleep, bleep. When she removed it from the box, the pizza rippled in her hands. She held it up before her face and it wriggled into her mouth. She turned to face him, “Sorry I didn’t share,” she said, blood dripping over her chin. She had a kitchen knife in her right hand. “Wanna die now?” she asked.
David awoke, his hair soaked with sweat, on the couch. It was dark outside and he walked to the bedroom to find his wife asleep on the king bed. They often slept separately, as he had a tendency to snore.
There wasn’t really any reason to think that anything was amiss, but he felt uneasy. Though it was the last thing he wanted to do, he decided to go look in the trash. He opened the door to the garage and let himself in. There was enough ambient moonlight coming through the windows that he didn’t have to turn on the fluorescents.
He looked in the garbage can and saw the Antonio pizza box. Relieved, he grabbed the box. But it collapsed, empty, between his fingers. And worse, he heard the rattle of someone trying the garage door.
- - -
Don Bagley writes from his home in north California. His work has appeared in Weiryear, Anotherealm, AlienSkin and Hackwriters UK. He's not mad like they say.
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